I like to keep the mood on Cheeky Cheeky pretty positive and peppy, if not 100% snarky, but today I've got some less than happy news to share with the Internet. Unfortunately for my life (and my insurance), I got in a car accident yesterday. I'm actually typing this from a hospital bed because I'm so severely injured- the only working bit of my body are my fingers. JK totally not true. I'm as healthy as any girl who drinks 6 cans of Diet Coke a day could possibly be. It was only a fender bender and no one was hurt at all... except for my dear baby, Olive Penderghast. She's in pretty bad shape. I'm heartbroken :(
Let's start at the beginning, shall we? I was having the best day, complete with morning blogging, a delicious lunch, and new car tunes. I was totally in my happy place. I was headed to class, jamming to some Anthony Green, when... it happened. The car in front of me had stopped to turn right, and let off their brake to go, but then didn't hit the gas because there was a pedestrian (the devil's invention, surely) crossing the street. I didn't realize he wasn't going (his brake lights weren't on because he was idling) and by the time I realized it, I was too late. I slammed on my brakes and turned to the left has hard as I could. To no avail- I still hit the dude from behind... Never thought I'd be writing that sentence on my blog.
You know what sucks more than getting in a car accident? Getting in a car accident and knowing it's 100% your fault. Not a fan, universe... Not. A. Fan. I really think of myself as a good driver, and this is totally one of those "I never thought it would happen to me" situations. Bummer of the day was realizing that I'm probably not as great of a driver as I envision myself to be- rumor has it "great drivers" don't rear end people and then say "oooops, my bad!" It was all so very Cher Horowitz, but not in a fashionable and adorable way. More in a sloppy, snotty, sobbing kind of way. It was extremely unattractive and pathetic, let me tell you. I really couldn't even believe it happened. Post-impact these were my immediate thoughts:
"Oh no. This actually happened."
"I hate my life.""I hate myself."
"God, you're an idiot. Only idiots rear end people.""What would happen if I just drove away?"
"I hate myself even more."
"Shit, man. This really sucks."
Then the rest is just even more expletives and self-loathing comments. I wish I could say I handled the situation well, but I was such a mess. Thank God my Mom was able to drive over and help me out because the accident happened so close to campus. She saved my ass because I was too busy hating myself and wishing I could rewind my life to even handle the situation. Turns out I have to go to court in a little over a week to deal with this. Adulthood just slapped me in the face.
Post-mini-accident, my emotions are all over the place. First and foremost, I'm SO happy no one got hurt. It could have been so much worse and I'm lucky the accident was so minor. Ugh, seeing the silver lining is exhausting. But really, even though it's so easy to have a negative attitude about this whole situation, that won't help matters in any way. I'm not going to get all "everything happens for a reason" on your ass, but it's not like I'm going to walk away from this without learning a lesson or 29. This mini-accident has taught me that adulthood is here, whether I like it or not. Resistance is futile when it comes to growing up and taking responsibility for myself as an "adult."
I'm srsly bummed that any money I have saved since moving home is probably going to be put towards repairing all the damage caused by this accident. No silver lining there. But I actually feel newly invigorated to get my shit together and keep on fighting the good fight or whatever. No more afternoons wasted on napping and laziness. (Okay, maybe just a few every now and then.) No more avoiding all of my problems and hoping they'll go away. If I want to do something, I'm going to do it. That's how I roll. From now until August, I have one main mission, and that is to save as much money as possible. If I'm moving this year, it's going to be around then and I need to get my ass in gear and figure out a way to make that possible. If I decide to stay in Ohio, then I need to figure out a more permanent job situation and keep saving that cash money. I'm tired of continuing to live in transition. I need to start making adult decisions and stop hiding behind the facade of a 23-year-old girl. Adulthood- let's do this.
Oh, and this is my "I'm sorry, Olive" face. Poor girl.