Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A Cheeky Cheeky Guide To: Wheat Beer



Everyone has their interests and hobbies, right? Some people are really into cars. I commonly refer to these people as douche bags. Others are really into working out. I commonly refer to these people as douche bags who make me look fat. But whatever. You get it. Everyone has the shit they're into and that they love. Well, while others have cars & working out- I have beer. I love beer with the passion that most people reserve for their children or their significant other. It's true. And kind of gross. Unlike other people's hobbies, my hobby gives me a cute little gut, and pretty much just gets me drunk. What some people might call a bender, I chose to call "beer research." See what I did there? You should probably be taking notes.

Okay, in actuality, I probably don't drink that much. I don't want you guys thinking I'm hammered everyday by noon or anything. Because first of all, everyone knows that you can't start drinking before noon unless it's a national holiday, like National Margarita Day, or something. GOD, GUYS!!! But you know how when someone is really, really into cars, they know like everything about them? They can see a car drive by and they're all like "Yep that's your standard V28 Jet Packer Ferrari with a 12 gauge transmission, yo!" (None of these are real car terms, FYI. Who do you think I am?) Well, I'm not actually like this with beer. Sure, it's one of my biggest interests, right up there with reality TV and making fun of people, but that doesn't mean I'm actually an expert. Really, I just thoroughly enjoy drinking beer. I do like trying new beers a lot. But just when I think I've mastered a certain kind of beer, I find out there's a whole other subset that I've never even tried. BLERG! The other thing effing with my Beer Master status is the fact that I don't like dark beer. I know, I know. I'm working on it though. And by that, I mean that last weekend I took a sip of someone's Guinness, spit it out and said "Ewwwy!" Progress, guys. I'll get there.

Anyway, if there is one kind of beer I believe I've somewhat mastered, it's wheat beer. It's my absolute favorite and I feel totally confident giving recommendations within this little subset of beer. I've tried more than my fair share of wheat beers, and then some. I picked my favorites of my favorites to share with you guys today. Most are Belgian Wheat variety because I'm a sucker for that country. They've mastered the art of both the beer and the waffle. I should totally move there, right? Anyway, here is my little list of faves! Let me know if you guys agree/disagree (I'll kill you) or which of these you've tried! Anyone else love beer as much as this crazy girl?

1. Allagash White- Hands down my favorite beer ever invented. If a dude wants to sweep me off of my feet, all he has to do is bring me a bucket of Allagash White and I'll marry him on the spot. I'm not even kidding. It's my dreamboat Belgian variety wheat beer- super crisp and light, with hints of citrus. I could drink this all day long. I thought it was actually Belgian until just now- turns out, it's brewed in Portland, Maine. Well done, you weird state!
2. Franziskaner Hefeweizen- German beer... a-swoon! I srsly love me a good hefe. Franziskaner or Weihenstephan, both are A+ in my book. The perfect blend of wheat and citrus. Light & full-bodied simultaneously- I know that sounds douchey but it's true! Totally delicious. Just thinking of this beer makes me remember afternoons spent drinking at The Beer Garden in Brooklyn. I haven't had a good hefeweizen since I've been back in Ohio. This needs to be rectified immediately. 

3. Leinenkugel's Sunset Wheat- Okay...truthfully, I don't even count these next three beers in the same category as the previous two. Those are of another caliber entirely. But you're not going to find those beers at every bar, especially not in the Midwest. Instead, you'll find Leinenkugel's, which is brewed in the beautiful state of Wisconsin. This beer is really fruity, but a great Summer beer. I love Leinenkugel's so much because they're a great Midwest brewery. If you're in the area, I'm guessing you already love them. Go Team Midwest! (.... that's not a real team.)

4. Shock Top- Um, yes. Shock Top is my favorite Blue Moon beer-with-dinner-at-home alternative, when I feel like I should mix it up because I don't want to get stuck in six-pack rut. It's really crisp and light- definitely less fruity than Leinenkugel's. Just a solid Amerrrrican made (Anheuser-Busch) Belgian White variety wheat beer. I also recently had Raspberry Wheat Shock Top and it literally changed my life. (Not really.) But it was damn yummy. 

5. Blue Moon- Need I say more? I probably drink Blue Moon more than most humans drink water, and I'm kind of okay with that. It's so delicious. Perfectly refreshing and fruity, with delicious hints of citrus and fruit. In terms of a domestic Belgian White variety, Blue Moon is as good as it gets. One time, at a beer tasting that one of my BFFs took me to (best birthday present EVER!) we had Peanut Butter Blue Moon. I can officially say that I've never before tasted something that delicious, and I probably never will again. It was so yummy! They only serve it at festivals and beer tastings, so I'll never be able to enjoy it from the comfort of my couch... WHY, GOD?! WHYYYY?!?!?!?!? Still, just knowing that Peanut Butter Blue Moon exists makes me happy. We're doing something right, America. 

Um... can someone get me a beer?

12 comments:

  1. I love Blue Moon with an orange slice, yum!

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  2. They don't sell Allagash in Belgium unfortunately.. You should really try 'Duvel'. It's our best, together with Stella Artois

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  3. oh man, you are a lady after my own heart. i love this! i'd love to see more posts on beer. thank you!
    sophie
    princessrhyme.blogspot.com

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  4. Hooray for beer! Allagash White is also one of my faves. 312 (from Goose Island here in the Windy City) has been one of my top wheat beers since college. Dark beers can be really tricky--the boyfriend's fave is Guinness and I won't touch the stuff. But I've had some really yummy stouts (dark but not too heavy) that were coffee or chocolate-based.

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  5. It's like you read my mind. I was JUST talking about my lack of beer knowledge and how I wish I knew more (I'm a wino myself) and that I only know a few I like...one being Blue Moon...and then you have to go and write a whole post about all these others I must try! THANK YOU! This is exactly what I needed!

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  6. I got really excited when I saw Leine's on there! I'm from the town where it's brewed, and actually went to the brewery yesterday for some yummy free samples! I really like the citrus in Sunset Wheat. :)

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  7. girl, you are fucking funny...i love you

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  8. I live in Beer City USA (2 years in a row!) or otherwise known as Asheville, NC. You would die, there's so many breweries here it's insane. There's this one bar here called The Thirsty Monk that only sells Belgium beers, it's amazing. Google it!

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  9. German wheat is the way to go. Try Erdinger it's great!

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  10. Wow, it's like you read my mind and transcribed it into this post! I heart Leinie's! And Blue Moon! And Shock Top everything! Great taste, girl. Two friggin' thumbs up.

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  11. I root for Franziskaner!
    :)

    bitterblondblog.blogspot.com

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  12. blue moon is totally my beer by default right now. and holy hell -- the orange slice that it's served with is hella awesome.

    oh, and not to brag...but i live 20 minutes from the leinys brewery. HOLLA WISCONSIN BINGE DRINKING!
    :)

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Thank you for taking the time to comment! It's lovely hearing from you :)