Thursday, November 8, 2012

Enjoying Those In-between Years

Man, oh man. Does anyone else feel like ages 0-20 barely prepared you for ages 20-30? I mean, I hate to be the one to say this, but life isn't turning out to be as easy as it looks in the movies. Like, I really thought I would end up dating my ex-step brother, riding off into our happily ever after in a white Jeep at the ripe old age of 18. GOD, it's like Clueless didn't prepare me for the real world AT ALL! What the heck, Cher Horowitz? Okay, but really. Have you ever realized how old you are, and what you're doing with your life and just been like "Wait, no. I'm supposed to be _________ by now!" {Insert any number of childhood expectations/dreams.} Every once in a while, this happens to me. I wake up one morning and realize that I'm 24 and am no where near where I thought I would be in my life. I can't help but feel like this is fairly common for people in our generation... Or at least I'm hoping it is.

It's so easy to look at other people- bloggers, writers, actresses, Lena Dunham {SHE DOES IT ALL!}- and think that your life has somehow veered of course. How do they have it all figured out? Why are their lives perfect while I'm paying back student loans and still trying to figure out how to walk in high heels? Here's the secret: their lives aren't perfect either! Even though they might look perfect from the outside, there's a whole mess of other stuff going on behind the scenes {or behind the blog, as the case may be.} It's easy to assume that because things seem a certain way from our point of view, that's how they really are. But everyone has their shit. Everyone has bad days. Everyone feels confused. Everyone hates waking up when their alarms go off. {And the people whose bodies wake them up naturally at like 6AM are just freaks.} I mean, HELLO- we all thought Will Arnett & Amy Poehler were the perfect couple. Now a gem like Amy Poehler is walking around, status: single. Hell, I'd still kill a bitch to have her life, but even she has her fair share of unhappiness to go through. Every human does. 

But even though everyone has their imperfections, it's still easy to slip into the habit of coveting what other people have. I mean, we live in a world where Snooki has her life more together than I do. If I focused on facts like that, I'd drive myself insane. Srsly. Lately, certain aspects of my life are better than I could have ever hoped, and others are lagging a bit. I'm constantly trying to focus on the positive aspects though, and allow the rest to just fade away into the background. Plus, perfection is boring. A little struggle builds character, or so I'm told. Even though I'm a big believer in controlling your own happiness and pursuing your goals, sometimes you just have to let go & let life roll. Sometimes it's enough to be driving down the PCH {or the 10, as is the case in these photos} with the windows down, the sun shining, singing along to good tunes with a really cute dude.

If you're anything like me and you're going through a period of the "in-between"- just know that you're not the only one. Instead of stressing, instead of being jealous of what other people have, instead of wishing your life was more "together" than it is right now- take a breath, relax, and just let life unfold in front of you, doing your best to enjoy every moment. That's what I'll be trying to do from now on.

{Seriously, I still can't get over how pretty everything is in Los Angeles. Even the freeways!}

xoxo. Carmen

22 comments:

  1. Happy to hear your loving LA !! I loved your post and I'm so with u on this one , your so right it so sucks to be perfect or at least make it seem.. Much love from riverside !! Yessi I use to live in the big LBC!! Check it out sometime :))

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  2. I'm almost 26 and can't figure it out yet either - but I think that is okay :)

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  3. This is exactly what I needed to hear right now! Thank you!

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  4. I've been trying to write a post like this for days! I'm only 23 but the other day I had a pity party, just feeling like I haven't done anything and my life is kind of an embarrassment. I ended up getting drunk and listening to Billy Joel's 'Vienna' and that made me feel better, but this post ALSO made me feel better. So thank-you.

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  5. haha anyone who wakes up naturally is actually prob goes to bed at like 9 and therefore is def not in their 20s anymore, not because we shouldnt go to bed that early but we havent realized we should let our bodies to go bed that early when they want to... or at least i haven't. oh ya anyway dont worry girl i'm 26 if it makes you feel better and do NOT have my shit together. for example... i was like 20 minutes late to work today because i couldnt find something to wear/haven't done laundry in over a month/have been wearing J's underwear for like a week... so ya needless to say i'm in the "in betweens" too and anwyay that was def TMI but ya, great post! oh, & to make us feel even better, my boss (whom I REALLY look up to) admitted to us the otehr day that sometimes she'll look at her 6 yr old and be like "when's the last time you've had a bath?" : )
    http://dusanabotswana.com/

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  6. Oh, you are still so young! We all are. We put too much expectations for the early life of ours, comparing it for what others do. I wouldn't want to be married and have kids, even I thought that that would have happened when I hit 30. I had dreams and expectations when I was younger, but these change as I grow up. It doesn't mean I gave up on these. Why on earth we try to reach everything already in our early twenties,as we have so much time left. I have so many new dreams since I realized this. We don't need to have everything figured out, ever ;)

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  7. Yeah I feel like the 20s are the times to explore, be free, and not worry. We all go through rough patches which only make us stronger. I feel like the older I get the more I realize what I want in life and it makes me happy because I have goals for myself and each day I think I'm becoming more attuned with my true self. When I was younger I didn't feel this way. I'm 24 as well, I never thought I would be where I am today but I think that is the beauty not having to conform to what society says but rather to go with your heart and your soul which will take you on your own journey. :) I totally agree with doing your best to just enjoy each and every moment, these little moments are the ones that make the big picture of life so beautiful.

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  8. Ugh, definitely feeling the "in-between". I'm 27 and barely starting school for what I actually love. (alot of time was spent doing stuff I thought I loved) and it's definitely frustrating. Thanks for pointing out that Snooki has her shit together more than I do..... I'm gonna go cry in a corner now.

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  9. Perfectly worded and I totally agree :)

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  10. this is a beautifully honest post. love it.

    ps: if you get the chance, please help a sista out by entering my cute giveaway going on! thanks girl and love the blog!

    love, rach.
    www.so--hi.blogspot.com

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  11. perfect words for me today! :) i couldn't agree more!

    Xx,
    Courtney
    shabbyloveschic.com

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  12. ugh will you just stop posting things that are literally my exact thoughts!? I've been thinking about this SO much lately - I'm nineteen so the 20-30 range hits a bit early I suppose, but I'm starting to realize I'm not entirely sure what I want or how to accomplish it...and that's okay! just trying to dip my toes in everything and see what i like best. also, I'll just say here and now that lena dunham and cher from clueless are two of my favorite people ever and I do wish my life would turn out like them. namely, marrying a cute musician. just saying.
    -Z
    sometimesztakespictures.wordpress.com

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  13. you couldn't have said it any better ... i'm turning 25 this year and i still live at home! what the heck? i think it's best to just take it day by day - with no expectations. {easier said than done!} xo jacqlyn

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  14. You are smart and funny and sassy and holy hell I love you so bad.

    You're great Carmen!

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  15. I could not understand you more, I'm 27 and am still waiting to feel like an adult, waiting to feel comfortable in my skin, waiting to know what I want in any aspect really... Today even I was walking around kicking my purse like I use to with my bookbag, I don't even know why I do that. Sometimes when I see kids I realize I'm an "adult" to them it scares the bejesus out of me, I feel like a kid (well a kid with rent, bills, a car, have to make my own dinner every night, etc) still. I don't want to grow up, I don't feel ready, and I don't feel ready to give up all the things I did when I was 19 or 22 even. Not to mention that I feel like I was 19 days ago and at the same time it feels like centuries and centuries ago. To be honest I feel more confused at 27 than I did at 22 and my life is in more order than it ever was before, I'm engaged and live with my fiance in our own house (we rent) and have it almost "together" but it still feels ...strange. I love this post, thank you so much for posting it, I think a lot of people feel this way.

    <3Honeysuckelle

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  16. Exactly! You deserve a round of applause for pinpointing everything to a "T" that I'm feeling right now. I think I'm just going to tell people to read your post instead of spending hours ranting. Thanks!! I'm definitely going to be a new follower of your blog!

    Ergo - Blog

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  17. I really needed to read this today. Thankyou!

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  18. Love this post! 28 here and definitely struggling with what it means to be an adult. I feel like that Hyperbole and a Half cartoon from a while back pretty much captures it. And I definitely agree about remembering that even the most photoshopped lifestyle bloggers are still real people and still have shitty days. To me I think it raises some questions about if there's an obligation to try to capture that as well, instead of just posting roses and glitter every day.

    http://lazarusbell.blogspot.com/

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  19. Loooooooved this post!

    I seriously don't understand morning people!! hahaha. HOW DO THEY DO IT. GAH. I can go to bed at 8pm and still have a hard time waking up! AT 10AM!! hahaha.

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  20. this! this is definitely the sort of blog post i need to read everyday.


    xoxo, Style Diaries a Lifestyle Blog

    FOLLOW: BLOGLOVIN / TWITTER / FACEBOOK

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  21. Ahhh - great post! This is my first time stumbling on your blog and I love this!
    I'm currently still a student, so for me it's more... the fear of feeling this way later? That is driving me now I guess. My room mate is no longer a student and is out there trying to find work - and it's terrifying me! Especially since I'm studying illustration, and it's got me wondering what the job market is for that. And what the heck I'm going to do! I guess I'll figure it out eventually... haha

    xo
    http://kittysnooks.blogspot.ca/

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